gratitude vs. entitlement

I came across something else interesting about gratitude today:

Seven Principles for Cultivating Gratitude

By Gregg Krech

1. Gratitude is independent of one's objective life circumstances;
2. Gratitude is a function of attention;
3. Entitlement makes gratitude impossible;
4. When we continue to receive something on a regular basis, we typically begin to take it for granted;
5. Our deepest sense of gratitude comes through grace -- the awareness that we have not earned, nor do we deserve what we have been given;
6. Gratitude can be cultivated through sincere self-reflection; and
7. The expression of gratitude (through words and deeds) has the affect of heightening our personal experience of gratitude. 

I particularly like the second point - gratitude is a function of attention. To me that speaks of focus, of living in the moment, of concentrating on one thing at a time (rather than multitasking, which is so often held up as a desirable ability).

Point 3 - entitlement makes gratitude impossible - also makes a lot of sense. If you believe you are entitled to something, and deserve it, or it's your right to have it, then you can't possibly be grateful. You may feel justified if you get it, you may feel a sense of satisfaction, but you won't feel gratitude.

Again, there's the difference between outward and inward focus - if you're paying attention, your focus is outward; if you have a sense of entitlement, the focus is inward. There's a definite pattern.

Today I am grateful for:

• wonderful friends who enjoy spending time together :)
• a marvellous pot of billy tea brewed with eucalyptus leaves, all to myself :)
• a husband who realises that I'm much better for the family when I have time for myself :)
• a daughter who volunteered to help make dinner :)
• a son who pats me on the back, and very sincerely says "Good job, Mummy!" :)